The Heart of Joy, Happiness

I usually write my message for the Dial the Dharma recordings on Mondays, often about something that happened over the weekend. On a weekend in late August, my daughter got married.  

I can’t begin to express what a joy it was to see my daughter get married.  Even more of an honor and joy, she and her fiance asked me to officiate their wedding. I had double duty. I walked her down the aisle with my wife and then I officiated the ceremony.  

Over nearly 40 years of ministry, I have officiated many weddings, but I had to hold my emotions in check and stay in control. I didn’t want to lose it emotionally and not be able to continue the ceremony.

Maybe many of you have experienced a wedding of your daughter and you felt some of the same emotions that I felt. Where did the years go?  Wasn’t it just yesterday that we brought her home from the hospital when she was born? Wasn’t it just yesterday when she was in preschool and brought home a little kitten in her arms and said, “Can we keep her?” Wasn’t it just yesterday when we moved her into her dorm as a freshman and were amazed at all the clothes that her roommate had when our daughter just brought T-shirts and basketball shorts like she always wears?  Here I was, walking her down the aisle at her wedding.  

When my daughter was born, we gave her the Japanese name, “Keiko.” I selected the Chinese character, or kanji, for her name and it means “joy.” It appears in one of the main sutras of Jodo Shinshu and it also appears in Shinran Shonin’s main writing, the “Shoshinge.” In the sutras, it refers to having joy of the teachings.  

I chose this character for my daughter’s name because I just wanted her to be happy. Isn’t that what we all wish for, that our children will be well and happy?  

My daughter’s new husband’s first name is Gaku. Gaku’s parents were born and raised in Japan and Gaku’s father chose a similar character for his son’s name, which also means “joy.” It is used in the word, “ongaku,” which means music in Japanese, but the characters separately mean, “the joy of sound.”  

I thought that Gaku’s father selected that character because he is a musician and piano teacher, but at the wedding reception, Gaku’s father explained that he chose that character because he wanted his son to “enjoy life.” I thought that was a wonderful wish for your child.  

My daughter’s name means “joy,” and her husband’s name also means “joy.” I guess that they are destined for a life of happiness and joy.  

In the Larger Sutra that Shin Buddhism is based upon, there are 48 vows that describe the deepest wish, the deepest heart of the Buddha. If we summarize those 48 vows and express them in the simplest manner, I think we could say that the deepest wish of the Buddha is for all beings to be happy, to have joy.  

Just like a parent wishes for the happiness and joy for their children, the Buddha’s deepest wish that is expressed in the Larger Sutra is for happiness, well-being and the liberation of all beings from this world of samsara. The Buddha’s deepest wish is not just for the temporary or fleeting happiness of sentient beings, but for the deepest sense of joy and happiness to encounter the Dharma and to receive it deep within our hearts and minds.

As parents who wish for the happiness and joy of our children, may we also find ourselves as sentient beings who are the object of the heart of great wisdom and great compassion. May that heart wish and aspire for our happiness, our joy and our well-being, liberating us from this world of ignorance and delusion — the world of samsara."