On Not Returning Hatred

In February, many people were moved by Bad Bunny’s halftime performance during the Super Bowl, especially by the message – “The only thing more powerful than hate is love.”

At a time when divisions fueled by hatred seem to be spreading, not only in the United States but throughout the world, this message felt especially timely. 

With this in mind, I would like to reflect on this theme from a Buddhist perspective.

In one of the oldest collections of the Buddha’s words, “The Dhammapada,” we find a teaching that closely echoes this idea. A well-known translation reads:

“Hatred is never dispelled by hate.Hatred is dispelled only by love.”

However, the phrase often translated as “by love” can also be understood more precisely as “by not harboring hatred.”

Certainly, responding with love is important. Yet Buddhism invites us to look one step further. The emphasis is not simply on loving others, but on not returning hatred with hatred and not receiving anger into our own hearts.

An illustrative story appears in Chapter Six of “The Sutra in Forty-two Sections,” one of the earliest Buddhist texts translated into Chinese: 

“One day, someone deliberately approached the Buddha and began to insult him. The Buddha did not respond with anger. Instead, he simply felt compassion for the man, recognizing that his mind was disturbed by ignorance. When the insults finally stopped, the Buddha calmly asked:

‘If you bring a gift to someone and that person does not accept it, to whom does the gift belong?’

“The man replied, ‘It returns to the one who brought it.’

“The Buddha then said: ‘You have just insulted me, but I do not accept it. Therefore, those words return to you. Just as a sound echoes back to the one who calls, and a shadow follows a form, one cannot escape the results of one’s actions. Therefore, refrain from harmful conduct.’”

What is important here is not simply that the Buddha responded with compassion, but that he did not receive the insults. No matter how compassionate we try to be, there will always be people in this world who harbor ill will. If we were to accept every hateful word directed toward us, our hearts would soon become overwhelmed.

But we have another choice: We do not have to receive it. 

If we do not accept those words, they return to the person who uttered them.

Not returning hatred for hatred.

Not responding to anger with anger.

And not receiving it.

Perhaps this is a wise way to live.

But how did our founder, Shinran Shonin, face anger and resentment? What did “not receiving it” mean in his life?

Shinran Shonin left many writings, yet he rarely spoke directly about his own emotions. One place where we catch a glimpse of his experience is in the postscript of his major work, “The Kyogyoshinsho.”

There, he records several painful events: his teacher, Honen Shonin, being exiled; Shinran Shonin himself being banished; and fellow disciples being executed. Yet, in this passage, we do not find words of anger or resentment. Instead, the events are recorded quietly and matter-of-factly.

It is said that Honen Shonin taught his followers, “Wherever you go, spread the teaching of the Nembutsu.” Because of this, Shinran Shonin may have even received his unjust exile as an opportunity to share the Nembutsu teaching.

One well-known episode from Shinran Shonin’s life involves a disciple named Myohobo Ben’en.

Ben’en had been practicing rigorous training as a mountain ascetic in the Kanto region. When he heard that Shinran Shonin had come to the area and was spreading a teaching very different from his own religious views, he became deeply angered. It is even said that he once intended to take Shinran Shonin’s life.

However, when Ben’en finally met Shinran Shonin face to face, something unexpected happened. Seeing Shinran’s presence, he was deeply moved and instead decided to become his disciple. Perhaps Ben’en spoke harsh words at that moment. Yet Shinran Shonin may not have received those words of anger.

To me, this reflects the way of a person of shinjin.

Among the Forty-eight Vows of Amida Buddha, the Thirty-third Vow teaches that those who encounter Amida’s light become gentle in both body and mind. This expresses how those who live supported by Amida Buddha’s Primal Vow gradually come to embody a softness of heart.

Perhaps the Shinran Shonin whom Ben’en encountered possessed just such a gentle presence.

Ben’en carried anger and jealousy within him, yet Shinran Shonin did not receive those negative emotions. Seeing this, Ben’en was deeply moved and chose to follow him.

Of course, Shinran Shonin also teaches in “Notes on Once-Calling and Many-Calling” that ordinary foolish beings constantly carry afflictions, and those afflictions do not disappear during our lifetime. Even after realizing shinjin, we do not suddenly become different people.

Yet precisely because we are such beings, we are supported by Amida Buddha’s Primal Vow, which assures us that we are never abandoned. In that assurance, we are able to walk our days with hearts that gradually become more gentle.

Anger and jealousy still arise within us. That is simply the reality of being human. But even so, supported by Amida’s compassionate working, may we continue to live each day with hearts that grow softer and more open.

Namo Amida Butsu.